The Cward Joke

As you guys may or may not know, there is a new joke that is sweeping the nation.  It is THE CWARD JOKE.  I did invent the joke, and I’m not saying that to be cocky, but to prevent any other bastards from saying that they invented this joke.  You can deffinetly invent a Cward Joke, but don’t you dare ever say, think, breath, write, type, or carve “I invented the Cward Joke.” because I did.

Before I can tell the legend of the Cward Joke, you must understand who the man behind the joke is.  Conor Ward is how name, and he is the man.  He is the King of Comedy, the Ruler or Riots, and the Creator of Cool.  I went through a phase in my pitiful 9th grade year where I called everyone horrible nicknames, starting with the first letter of their first name, with a hyphen, and then their last name:

John Smith: J-Smith
Captain Hook: C-Hook
Helen Keller: H-Keller

So of course I did this with many of my friends, but Conor Ward was one of the few who’s name actually stuck, C-Ward.  We called him this for a while and he hated it, which is natural with the beginning part of a nickname.  For the first year of my nickname “Boony” I couldn’t stand it, but I grew used to it and now love it.  But what really drove Conor crazy is when Jeremy Bingham (also the man) combinded the C-Ward nickname, and we got CWARD!!!  Conor hated this even more, but that doesn’t matter, because it was the best nickname to ever be applied to an individual person.  This was exactly one year before the actual birth of the Cward Joke.

The Cward Joke was invented on Wednesday, August 23rd, during a soccer tryout.  Conor Ward (the God of Amazingness) was blasting a shot on net, about to end the goalie’s life.  I, waiting in line for my turn, said to myself “Wow, he’s coordinated.”  I immediatly recognized the pun and went up to Galen.

Me- Hey Galen, what do you call Conor Ward with good use of his muscles?

Galen- What?

Me- Cwardinated!!!

That, my friends, what the first Cward Joke to ever be made.  Ever since then there have been a bunch, which I will randomly throw into my website for entertainment.  Do you want to send me a Cward Joke??  The rules are simple:

1. The jokes must be somewhat funny and not the stupid kind that Galen thinks up
   Galen Weber Cward Joke:
   Q: If Conor Ward joined the army, what would be be?
   I: A Cwardinal
   None of that, that’s not even the slightest bit funny.
2. The question of the joke must include Conor Ward
3. The answer (or punchline) of the joke must be a pun of a word that has the “ord” sound in it replaced with “cward”
   Example: Ordinary becomes Cwardinary
4. If you have a joke, submit it to me and I will gladly consider maybe posting it up.

Send them to me at RandyQuenchVFM or Bizzoony45 and I’ll take a look at them.  Have fun, I’m looking forward to your excwardinary jokes.