Violence In Sports
Today’s topic of discussion is very serious to me: sports violence. Sports were once an activity revolving around recreation and fun, but have slowly evolved into excuses for aggression. Take, for example, England. No country is more patriotic or prouder than England. The nationalism in that country could overpower any other, and the brotherhood amongst its citizens is stronger than anyone else’s. Which is why you wouldn’t be surprised to find out that during the Euro Cup, the English soccer team’s supportive fans celebrate their team’s victory by joining together, sharing laughs, and—in some festive cases—lighting cars on fire.
You can’t blame the English though. Their sense of nationalism is fueled by more than heart and love of the game. Their pride is powered by something powerful. It rushes through their veins, causing a momentary high in which their inner devotion can no longer be withheld. The English’s pride is energized by one thing: beer. When filled with this alcoholic pride, soccer no longer becomes a sport. It becomes a social even in which you and your friends sing songs, celebrate life achievements, and viciously riot in the street.
Without beer, sports would be exactly what they were meant to be: entertaining. Let’s look, for instance, at America’s favorite pastime of baseball. When baseball grew in the 1920’s it was very amusing. Families would go to the ballpark dressed in their most formal outfits—as if they were going to church—to see legendary heroes build their careers. Baseball was a game of numbers, and nothing else.
It was later that baseball was combine with America’s other favorite pastime: aggressive drinking. Fans no longer went to games for entertainment, but instead used it as a place to socially drink. Fights would erupt against opposing fans—and even fellow teammates—and most fans wouldn’t even watch the game. Ball parks have inevitably tried to resolve the problem by charging 7 dollars a beer, but determined fans will not be defeated. And if you don’t believe that beer has infected baseball, just look at this comparison:
What Fans Wore In The 1920’s
What Fans Wear Now
My interest in the subject arose when I had a personal experience with sports violence. I was at my girlfriend’s field hockey game, and things were getting rough.
Field hockey, for those of you who don’t know, was invented in the 1960’s during the women’s rights movements as a “replacement sport.” Replacement sports arose when women demanded “equal rights” and men needed to stop their persistent bitching and quickly invent sports for them. First, they tried to make women’s leagues from men’s sports, they that failed miserably, as shown by A League Of Their Own. So instead, they invented replacement sports; activities competitive enough to qualify as sports, but easy enough that girls can still play them on their period.
Softball evolved from baseball, but in order to make it easier two things were eliminated:
1. The overhand pitch
2. The entertainment
Similarly, field hockey came from men’s ice hockey, but made it easier for girls by taking it off the slippery ice, making it basic so that girls only have to use one side of the stick, elimination checking, and getting rid of that nasty “intensity” that takes place in most real sports.
Watching my girlfriend play field hockey was almost as exciting as eating glue. A bunch of girls were just running around aimlessly and every time an offensive attack started to develop the whistle would blow and the play would stop. Luckily, things got exciting when one girl on the other team started getting into a girl on our team’s face. The two began pushing one another and yelling in each other’s face. I couldn’t hear the argument, but I assume it went like any other sport trash-talk:
Girl 1: Your shorts don’t match your shoes!
Girl 2: Oh yeah, well your socks don’t match your stick!
Girl 1: Take that! (Shoves Girl 2)
Girls 2: Everyone thinks you wear too much makeup!!
Girl 1: YOU BITCH!
This vicious trash-talk continued throughout the game until we won 12-3. That’s another thing about “replacement sports,” they’re normally so boring to watch because one team completely dominates the other. Rarely will you see a women’s sport that is so close that you get interested; the two exceptions being the 1998 Women’s Soccer Finals and the Rock Of Love 2 reunion. (In Case You Missed It)
After the game, our team gathered to celebrate the win and later went out to our cars. It was then we found out that our car windows were smashed. Two windows, actually. One van window had been completely decimated, while another car had a rock thrown through it. Horrified by what had just happened to her van, a girl on our team expressed dreadful concern towards the accident. “They had better not have taken my Hollister clothes!” she yelled, jumping into the car and grabbing a shopping bag. The clothes were still there (Thank GOD!) but one girl did get her purse stolen and my girlfriend’s dad had his briefcase taken. I lost all the homework I had worked so tediously to complete and was unable to hand it in.
In that single incident, field hockey gained my respect. It was no longer a replacement sport, but an aggressive activity that resulted in window smashing and grand-theft-purse. I am personally signing up for a field hockey team so that I can partake in the action. But first, I think I need a drink.
